token from the past.

They say that everything happens for a reason..we do things sometimes tht we don't really wna do..sometimes we say things tht we dnt really wna say..but in the end,when you're alone and you're thinking abt the events tht took place throughout your day u realize tht wutever happened tht day happened for a reason..it made a difference..there is no point in trying to change something tht has already happend,there is no point in that..and i guarantee tht u will be unsuccessful in that


Today I got something back,something that once meant a great deal to me..something that still means a great deal to me,it reminds me of all the promises that I was once a part of..It reminds me of him.
As i look down at it while i type,there seems to be a sudden calm..like my brain trying to organize every memory tht i had with him,so it can slowly play it one by one..
our mind plays nasty tricks on us sometimes..it gangs up with our heart and tries to make us feel things,like it just happened yesterday..


Sometimes i find myself asking stupid questions to myself..
Is it possible to have just one perfect person out there for everyone?
When uve had it all,it feels like thats it..there cant be anyone better..when ur with a person and it feels so right..how can it not be it? can there be better? what if i dont want better?
nobodies perfect to be honest.. but when u find a person perfect for u..i think tht person is ur soulmate..and there is no age limit.
Why wud god make so many matches for one person? He knws who is gna be perfect for whom.. God knows exactly wut u want..so maybe there are soulmates,just one perfect person out there for everyone.
Maybe u already found that person.. Maybe u lost em too..
But the beauty of it is,if that person is truely ur soulmate.. Maybe in the future, years frm now.. They'll come back to u..Maybe that's how u can be sure..
Nothing is certain,im guessing.. its all maybes.. but maybe i am right..
because if ur reading this and there is one person whose face keeps popping in ur head and when u lsn to a song and u can only relate it to one person and when sometimes your're just sitting,doing nothing and suddenly u find urself smiling to the thought of tht person..i guess thts how u kno if this shit is true or not.

Tonight,I look at this.. This token,frm my past and realize that I am no longer the same person that once received it...
It feels like I'm looking back into the past..with all these memories flashing back in my head,and suddenly I'm there..Once again.. Feeling everything,being a part of that amazing feeling,and somehow i cannot relate to them anymore,they are my memories ..but it feels like another person has lived them..
i know ive changed but up until now i hadnt realised why i changed..there was nothing wrong with me..sometimes ppl change unintentionally because they growup or wutever..
but i changed cause i had to..i was so used to someone being a part of me..we were two ppl but it felt like one..so when after tht its just u again.. i guess u have to change right ?
how can u exist there on ur own when tht place was shared by two ppl? it was time to let it go..try to be me again..all of me.

happiness will wait.

I remember saying "Nothing is definite..so why waste our time in loving someone when tomorrow it can all be washd away..wuts the point in fighting for someone or something when u can probably die the next second? Wuts the reason behind it all..?"
Well the reason behind it all is happiness.

You do things without thinking..but to be honest,u never kno the end to anything..
Wut the fuck wud u have by over thinking abt something that might never even happen?
Alright,so ur love ended.. Wut did u get frm it?
U got memories,u got experience.. U got love.. The moment in time when ur soul and another soul were one. Did u ask why u were there then? No,because u were happy..
So why question shit when ur unhappy?   Its part of life,ups and downs..if ur happy then u have to be
unhappy too afterwards.. Its the balance..too much happiness isn't good for u.. Neither is too much sorrow.

When love ends..dnt just focus all ur energy on the sadness,I'm not saying not to grieve..but just remember how happy u were.. And be happy, that once In ur life u had no care in the world.. U were loved and u loved someone with no bad intentions..it was sacred and pure.That's rare.. So be happy that u found love,because it doesn't find everyone.. And in the middle of all that, grieve because ur love is gone.
Dnt be upset for too long.. Happiness is always around the corner,its the balance in life..because if u forget to look around and smile frm time to time,ull forget that there's always a light at the end of the tunnel.

morbid? perhaps.

I'm the type of person,no matter how great things are going always picture the worst..in the end its gna be u standing there,alone...why not just anticipate this crap?

No one can truly be trusted..hypothetically u trust this guy..or u kno wut let's turn it around..

Hypothetically someone trusts u with their heart..I think that's the biggest deal,the most u can trust someone with.

Property,money,ideas these things are all materialistic..stuff used to survive in this world..but your heart...that's your own..even if u have nothing..ull have your heart..

So then someone trusts u with their heart right...and up until recently u thought not to elevate the romance and end it there,because there is no future..wut did u do?

U broke that persons heart and in return broke their trust.

Everyone is gna fuckin disapoint u,leave u..break your fuckin heart..

So trust no one..because in the end,its gna be you..just you againt the world.

I might sound bitter and depressed..truth is I'm very happy.

Recently I discovered that humans can die of a broken heart,I thought that applied just for elephants..but its not true.

U see your heart is fragile...why put it on the line? I shud consider myself a hypocrite right abt now because I've trusted someone with my heart..I gave it to him and belived him when he said that he will not break it..

But the thing is..even tho I say all these things about not trusting someone, and still end up trusting a person..I'm still careful,because I expect the worst..well atleast most of the time..

People aren't evil,most of the time they dnt intentionally wna fuck someone over,it just happens..its a human quality,nobody is perfect..everyone makes mistakes,and some of those misttakes are unforgivable..

But if u love someone,deeply..with ur soul,you will find a way to forget abt it..and to forgive that person.

Your life is only gna be as exciting as u make it..by the chances u take..dnt expect shit to just happen..you’re gna have to make it happen..

U wna fall in love? Go find love..

U wna be rich? Go find a way to do that..

I'm all abt dancing in the rain but the truth is,I am shit scared..I dnt wna die frm a broken heart and even if I dnt endup dying..who's to kno that I'd be strong enough for the storm the next time it comes to town?